my mothers blessing
a mother’s blessing offers a beautiful space to acknowledge & celebrate the life experience of pregnancy and the rite of passage of birth.
bringing family & friends to gather around you & your baby, ahead of your birthing day, can be incredibly moving & empowering. loved ones bring food to nourish your pregnant body, giving you energy for you birth. gentle & meaningful acts of care such as a hand massage, hair brushing/braiding will shower you with love & affection, strengthening your belief in the support they can give. decorating your skin & dressing you with flowers allows each person to acknowledge & honour you & the journey you are taking.
i am sharing the story of my mothers blessing, which i was very happy to gift to eva bay greenslade as part of her online course Shamanic Preparation for Pregnancy & Birth
if you would like to explore creating a mothers blessing for yourself, or a friend, please do drop me a line i am able to facilitate groups or individual blessings that can bring a deep meaning and connection to your pregnancy journey…
“all that you need to welcome her into the world and into your hearts has grown within you. together you bloom and flourish”
In the town of dorking, where I live, we are lucky to have a community orchard, it’s a patch of land on the hillside above my allotment. There are old & newly planted apple trees, a rescued mulberry tree and a giant hornbeam with a bench around the trunk. It's a quiet, special place and it was here that a circle of my friends organised a mother blessing for me when I was pregnant with my second child.
I had been part of the blessings for a few of the other mothers in our friendship group held here, & it had somehow, unspoken, become our place to gather. When I let my friends know that I was pregnant, there was an almost immediate excitement that we would be able to gather again! The blessings for each of my friends had been special, unique and entirely uplifting, and I was so happy that I would be able to experience this gift for myself too! We chose a date and a time together and then my friends took care of the rest! On the day of my blessing I had a message from one of the mothers to walk to the orchard and to look out for the signs, to bring my hairbrush and anything else that I might need, but that everything else was ready. I had made some sharing food and I think some herbal iced tea, and I made my way along to the lane. It was a sunny day and as I walked up the path I noticed a ribbon tied to the branch of a tree, and a little way ahead another, and another. My friends had lined the pathway with these little signals for me that this was the way, they honestly felt like little love notes and I couldn’t stop myself from smiling! As I walked into the orchard I could see some bunting wrapped around the big tree and a group of beautiful women waving me to them!
There were lots of rugs, blankets and cushions laid on the grass and a table with plates full of food and different drinks. We'd all brought a mug for tea and everyone had made some food to share. we sat on the blankets and shared food, stories & memories of when our babies were little and of our births, it just all fell naturally in that place, I guess as it does when mothers gather! As we sat, my friends quietly wove a headdress of gorgeous flowers for me and each friend took a turn to paint a mandala on my pregnant belly. There was a basket of wool and ribbon and my friends passed around a god’s eye, each mama weaving a layer of a different colour onto the little wooden cross. One of my friends massaged my hands and another brushed my hair.
My friends placed flowers on my head and gave me a beautiful handmade card, each of them had written me a heartfelt message inside. Before we left we wrapped a thread around each of our wrists and I knew these women would keep their thread close, and me in their thoughts & hearts until my baby was here. I felt loved. I felt honoured. I felt held. I was blessed by those women with their love, thought and care for me as I sat in the sun, heavy in belly and nearing closer to my birthing time.
I hung the god's eye & the card on the wall in the room where I was planning to birth my baby, alongside other messages & affirmations to bring me strength and guidance on my birthing day. As my birthing day drew closer I felt strength & confidence when I touched the thread on my wrist, knowing that it connected me with the love I'd felt from my friends on my blessing. I can vividly remember during my labour focusing on the god's eye on my wall whilst I was breathing through my surges. I knew the colours that represented each friend and I felt so connected with their energy and love during my labour. I held the thread on my wrist as I breathed, knowing they would be holding theirs too, it was such a simple yet powerful connection, one little thread.
The energy these women had given to me on that day had become a tangible, almost tactile thing for me, almost like a weighted blanket around my shoulders. I could feel their presence during my birth, they gave me real strength.
When my daughter was here I found the first few weeks understandably hard, navigating life as a mother to two, and again that thread on my wrist gave me hope, and a focus, since I'd seen my friend's journey through this and I knew it would somehow be ok. Some friends cut their threads once my daughter was born, others waited a little longer until they had seen us both. Some of the friends' threads fell off on their own accord, almost like a sign that a phase had passed & they no longer needed to worry.
I honestly feel that my second pregnancy was a blur, particularly in comparison to my first, and I often feel guilt for not having been able to focus on my daughter's pregnancy with the same attention as my first. My blessing day was a true gift and I will forever be thankful to each of the beautiful women who held me and honoured me that day.
This blessing story is shared as a part of Eva Bay Greenslades beautiful online course Shamanic Preparation for Pregnancy & Birth I highly recommend all of her services & offerings as a doula and celebrant.